Another Poor Watchdog Argument

According to a story on Wired's Game | Life blog, yet another watchdog group is making yet another poorly reasoned argument about kids being corrupted by games. This time they've chosen to focus on the Traveler's Tales Lego series, specifically Lego Batman. What harm could possibly be done by a game less violent than most anything a child could watch on Cartoon Network or Nickelodeon (even during the day)? Let's let the Campaign for a Commercial Free Childhood educate us:

"How do you turn the ultimate creative toy into a symbol of commercialized childhood? Begin by partnering with media companies to sell that toy in branded kits designed for recreating movies like Star Wars, rather than creative construction. Then, dispense with hands-on building altogether by turning your toy into a video game so that instead of deciding what to build next, children choose which cyber weapons to use to beat up their opponent. Finally, ignore the fact it was rated suitable for ages 10 & up and partner with McDonald’s for a Happy Meal toy giveaway to simultaneously promote the video game, junk food, and the violent Dark Knight movie series to preschoolers."

Now before I make my argument, I suggest you take a trip over to the group's TODAY Awards page from which the above text was taken. The descriptions of all of their nominees for this award for worst toy of the year (or whatever--to be honest, I don't care enough about the distinction to look at their page again) suggest that this is not your typical concerned soccer moms group. Rather, all of their blurbs feature the tone (and common fallacies) of reactionary groups like Greenpeace--the ones who try to cover their backward-thinking agendas with the guise of progressivism, promoting blind anti-corporatism and generally throwing out the baby with the bathwater. Now, let's dissect their argument for why Lego Batman will ruin the future of any child unfortunate enough to come into contact with it.

How do you turn the ultimate creative toy into a symbol of commercialized childhood? Begin by partnering with media companies to sell that toy in branded kits designed for recreating movies like Star Wars, rather than creative construction.

This claim is wrong on so many levels, it's tough to know where to begin, so I'll try to just take things in order. First of all, calling Legos "the ultimate creative toy" is the kind of hyperbole that gives you good reason to be skeptical of any claim that follows. But what really irks me here is the total lack of understanding of how creativity typically develops. As a former art student and graphic designer myself, I like to think that I know a thing or two about being creative. One of those things is that people who make claims like the above probably are not particularly creative themselves. If they were, they would realize that creativity can't be expressed without a certain level of technical skill. A very common way that budding artists develop that technical skill is by copying other artists. It's the same reason computer geniuses often start out by taking apart pieces of technology that interest them. All the imagination in the world is useless if you don't know how to objectify what you've imagined. I would say that building replica X-Wing fighters is just as valid a way to learn that technical skill as building replica police boats, fire trucks, or medieval castles.

The other problem here is the assumption that what every kid who picks up a lego block wants to do is unleash her unique imagination on the world. Some kids just want to build the Deathstar, just like some teens learn the basics of creative writing because they want to write Sonic the Hedgehog slashfics. And this is why these faux-progressive groups irritate me so much: they pretend that they're trying to liberate kids from the oppressive influence of corporations while putting strict limits on what counts as acceptable behavior. In other words, their actual interest isn't freedom, it's promoting their own values as the only viable ones.

Then, dispense with hands-on building altogether by turning your toy into a video game so that instead of deciding what to build next, children choose which cyber weapons to use to beat up their opponent.

This is the only remotely true bit of the above blurb, but even still it is not entirely true. Now I'll admit that I have not played Lego Batman, but a cursory glance at Youtube and a couple of reviews showed that, while the gameplay does seem to focus on (the tamest imaginable) violence, there are some puzzles which involve building things with Legos. I'm going to go out on a limb and guess that, like many of these watchdog groups, nobody at the Campaign for a Commercial Free Childhood has actually played any of the iterations of Lego Batman, and that what is being criticized is the concept. And I would actually let that pass--if I got the impression they had done what I did, and taken ten minutes to watch a couple of videos and read a couple of reviews. But as we shall see from their last statement, truth is not the issue here...

Finally, ignore the fact it was rated suitable for ages 10 & up and partner with McDonald’s for a Happy Meal toy giveaway to simultaneously promote the video game, junk food, and the violent Dark Knight movie series to preschoolers.

Ah, now we get to the heart of the matter. The real issue here is not that "the ultimate creative toy" has been made into a fighting-centric video game, but that the great Satan, McDonalds, is somehow profiting from it. Decrying exploitation of children is one thing, but to assert that playing a Batman game is going to somehow result in preschoolers driving themselves to McDonalds for a Happy Meal and then going to a screening of The Dark Knight Returns is almost too absurd to acknowledge. Where are the parents in all this? Why are they not saying "no" to the kids who are screaming for Happy Meals? Why are they not explaining to kids that some movies are for adults only? Why is this group not encouraging parents to have a dialog with their children to foster mutual understanding? The reason is that their goal is not to empower parents with information (if you want to see what that looks like, visit the great website What They Play), but to push their anti-corporate agenda. I could point out that, in its own way, this is an example of exploiting children, even if the end it ideological rather than financial. But that would be too easy.

I have to say, of all the watchdog groups who have targeted video games, Campaign for a Commerical Free Childhood is the most odious I have taken the time to look into. I hesitate to reveal my own politics in this blog because they're generally irrelevant, but let's just say I consider myself anything but conservative. However, I think that groups like this that blindly lash out at all of the corporate boogeymen of the reactionary left, label as "commercial" any form of serialized entertainment, and promote technophobia and anti-corporate fear-mongering rather than education, empowerment and parental responsibility sicken me. If you don't want your children to eat at McDonalds, fine--there are sound arguments for why they shouldn't (though they have to do with health, not evil Happy Meal toys). If you don't want them to play violent video games or watch violent movies, fine; again, there well-reasoned arguments to be made, and since every child is different, it's a decision every parent has to make for himself or herself. But to say a child shouldn't be allowed to enjoy Legos or Batman because McDonalds might turn a profit off of it is the kind of irrational thinking that, when used by parents, can do a lot more harm to kids than a video game.

A Week's Worth of Snark

It has been an incredibly strange week for gaming nerds. And when there's news, there are stupid message board and blog posts to laugh at/be outraged by.

Tuesday was a horrible day with 1Up being sold to the Hearst Corporation, half of its staff immediately being canned, EGM being cancelled, and Gamevideos.com apparently shutting down due to lack of ad revenue. Fortunately those let go seem to be landing on their feet: The 1Up Show crew has done especially well, with their new Rebel FM podcast landing at #2 overall on iTunes (according to Nick Suttner's Twitter feed). And while I pronounced the site dead to me in my last post, it looks like that might have been too hasty; my favorite 1Up writer, Jeremy Parish (not among the fired), has pledged to help keep the revamped site boobie-free.

But as hard as this was for 1Up fans to endure, it has been almost as hard to watch the parade of delusional teenagers blogging on the site about their departure from 1Up, as if they had worked there and been let go themselves. I won't link to any of them, because they seem to be mostly gone from the front page now, and I'll be damned if I'm going to waste time searching for them. Of course everyone grieves in his or her own way, but playing make-believe that you were among the casualties and writing soul-searching blogs about what you'll do now that your time with 1Up is over is not just pathetic, it's insulting to those who were actually affected and now have to find new jobs in the worst American economy since the Great Depression.

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Friday saw a breaking story on a new patent filed by Nintendo, called the Kind Code. Kotaku called it a "potential paradigm shift", which is almost certainly an overstatement, but nevertheless, the technology, which would apparently allow players to select a sort of auto-pilot option during parts of a game which they did not want to (or, more likely, could not) complete, sounds like it could be the next evolution in cheats.

The self-righteous hardcore crowd has reacted to this exactly as you would expect them to: pronouncing Nintendo dead, refusing to play any game that implements the tech (even as an option), even declaring the death of the entire medium. Keep in mind this is just a patent, no plans to actually implement it have yet been announced, and since it was filed in the name of Shigeru Miyamoto, it's unlikely that the system would initially be implemented in any games not for Nintendo consoles or handhelds. Of course the irony is that every time the self-appointed gatekeepers of video games start sounding off about Nintendo's idiocy, Miyamoto and co. rake in another few million yen. Personally, I'm all for the system. I know plenty of non-gamers who have expressed interest in certain games, but ultimately decided against getting into the hobby because of a fear that they could never be good enough to make the investment worthwhile. If technology like this would make them feel more comfortable experimenting with some "core" gaming experiences, that can only be a good thing. With developers and publishers having to lay off staff, anything that could bring more money into the industry (without being anti-consumer) is a good thing.

Finally, there's the strange case of Robert Pelloni, a would-be indie developer who has apparently been singlehandedly crafting his own DS game for five years now. The problem is, Nintendo has refused to let him get his hands on the DS dev kit, for various reasons that Pelloni has addressed in a ranting, obsessive, and almost certainly unreliable way at his site. As a result, Pelloni had started a protest which involved locking himself in his studio for 100 days in order to draw attention to the apparent injustice of Nintendo not wanting to hand their developement tools over to any unstable loner who comes knocking at their door. Sometime late Friday or early Saturday, the protest ended with Pelloni "faking his own death" on his webcam and subsequently being raided by the police after a concerned 4chan user (yes, they can feel concern) tipped off Bob's family and local authorities.

Setting aside for a moment the obvious fact that this stunt has probably ruined Pelloni's chances of ever being taken seriously in the industry (well, maybe Gamecock will offer him a job), the man obviously has greater problems than not being able to get his game published. I have personally known someone who pulled the "death over webcam" stunt, and it is not, as Pelloni is now claiming, "just a joke". Nor is it a publicity stunt. I loathe the term "cry for help", but that's the most common expression for this type of behavior. Hopefully Bob will set his game aside for the time being and get a little perspective before, oh, I don't know, realizing that there plenty of distribution outlets and platforms besides the DS.

Mr. Driller Online

I find it sad how easy it is for a game to get a horrible reputation these days. It kills games before they are ever in their complete state. Others are not given a chance to correct themselves before they are blasted and find themselves candidates for the worst game of 2008. Since Gamespot usually annoys me I thought I would strike back.

Mr. Driller Online was held to too high a standard I think. Not that that is a bad thing but I think people were expecting something glorious and flawless when it hit XBLA and I don't know where that expectation came from. There are almost no perfect releases anymore. Fallout 3 is one of the buggiest messes I've seen recently. But I love Fallout 3. I do not necessarily love Mr. Driller though I feel it deserves a fair chance.

Compared to other Mr. Driller games, Mr. Driller Online is a decent continuation. The series has been characterized by deceptively simple game play and puzzles that yield multiple right and wrong ways to solve them. The learning curve is high if this is your first introduction to drilling and the levels are at times agonizingly long.

The biggest complaint I have is how the difficulty differs between star ratings. In Standard Driller mode the difference between the America level and Egypt is ridiculous. America is a cake walk compared to the air-restrictive designs of Egypt. I suppose this comes from the game only having 5 levels in both modes but there is not a gradual step up in difficulty. Once you leave the first two levels you are thrown into a pit of despair. I would have liked to see a better transition between difficulties.

What I love is the different feel between depth markers. In the Egypt level the first series of blocks have a sandy feel to them and that is followed by a stonier look beneath. They did get the look of these levels right and most times the music syncs up nicely with the mood.

The characters also add an extra bit of depth to the game. All the characters are playable right off the bat and I do enjoy playing as Susumu more than anyone else but Horinger-Z's run through of levels adds more strategy as his air requirement is very very small but his movements are slow. But the one character I don't see any use for is Taizo or Susumu's father. He is slow and he requires so much air that he gets you killed more than anyone else. But the 6 playable characters gives you a chance to customize your experience with Mr. Driller Online.

I am not an Online gaming person so I feel this game suffers from the online play although it has been patched since the first reviews. It is a puzzle game, not a group puzzle game and that shift into making it multi-player seems forced. That killed this game in the eyes of reviewers and I agree that it is certainly not worth its price tag. But it is not one of the worst games to be released as the main gameplay is fun and classically Drillerful.

In the end I think the game is not worth buying on its own but if you rarely get anything on the Arcade and find a copy of Namco Virtual Arcade for cheap it is a welcome title. I don't think it is something that should be completely dismissed but I do not think it merits indepth play.

Mostly I wanted to prove that Mr. Driller is not nearly as horrible as people make it out to be. But I am a dying breed of gamer. I don't enjoy online competition. I enjoy walking through worlds on my own. I am annoyed with the scathing reviews from people who supposedly played this game.

So, if you acquire this because you wanted dig dug 1 & 2 and Galaga Legions, give Mr. Driller Online a chance.